I’m an actor and maybe an overly sensitive one at that, but what’s the point of being an actor if you’re not sensitive, right? I just wanted to share that I had a bad day yesterday. I felt bad about an audition and had a fight with my girlfriend…
, so I thought it would be helpful to analyze how to deal with adversity/rejection, and get a little perspective on things. Don’t expect anything life altering here…just sharing an experience and hopefully by seeing my experience and how I am trying to deal with it, you can see alternatives to how you deal with similar situations in your own life, both personal and acting. Thanks and peace! Today was a little better, but not that much. I seriously think sometimes I have a chemical imbalance or something because my emotions can get way out of control and what seems like the end of the world or a major personal attack turns out to be only what I decided to make of it. I think a key to learn in life is that we often perceive attacks against us far more strongly than the attack is intended…so knowing that it might be helpful to try to assume that you are not being attacked (even if it feels like it at the time) and turn your perception into something more positive like constructive feedback, etc. We have an image of who we are and it is amazing how easily that image is skewed by even what a stranger might say to us.

How whack is that? Some guy at the carwash comments on your hairstyle or your car and you question your entire existence…is my hair too short, is my car a piece of shit, etc. We work hard, we love, we help others, we smile and we laugh and then one criticism from a stranger and we are in tears and need therapy. That is just not right and it is not necessary. I often question how as soon as something bad happens at a school, they rush in the counselors…why? Kids are pretty pathological, meaning that they don’t feel a ton of emphathy because they haven’t developed those skills yet because they haven’t had to take care of themselves so they don’t appreciate how hard life really is except on a kid level, as in they didn’t get what they wanted at the mall or didn’t get enough ice cream, so when something bad happens to some other kid at the school I’m fairly certain they aren’t thinking OMG, how am I going to deal with this. They are like, I hardly knew that kid…that’s too bad, but I gotta run to baseball practice or whatever. You bring in the counselors and they are going to start thinking…hmm an authority figure is telling me that everything is going to be ok and am I ok and do I need help or take time off school, or whatever counselors do and the kid is going to do one of two things…they are either going to take advantage of it by faking that they are traumatized for more attention or more material goods or time off school or they are going to be convinced that they indeed are traumatized and it is going to affect them more than it would have if no one had mentioned it to them. We forget that generations of people before us went throught horrific wars and lost entire families and they came back and there were no counselors and yes some of them were really messed up and needed help and maybe they didn’t get it, but the vast majority were able to carry on and live relatively normal lives, because the majority of people are basically sheep. Whatever they are told, they believe so if you tell them you have to go to war and kill people, they normalize it, and if you tell them they should feel bad because some kid was killed at school, they are going to normalize that and do what they are told…until someone of authority tells them different. The number of people who are able to think for themselves in minute. That’s why there are so few people who stand out in society because they really are special. They have to dare to be different or stand up and say what they believe in or sing or dance or act, or whatever. That is why even the ‘evil’ leaders succeed because they are willing to stand by their convictions and when there is no one else around that feels as strongly as they do about their convictions, of course they win because people want someone to tell them what to do, how to live, how to work less or get more or be better or feel prouder about who they are. Well that is some rant and what does it have to do with acting? Well I think I can summarize by saying this…at some point you are going to have to be willing to really stand up and sing/dance/paint/talk/act as though your life depended on it, and really let go and be proud of exactly who you are and not who you think the ‘room’ wants you to be because they don’t want you to be anything…they want to see someone they’ve never seen before who captures the material in a way that inspires them. That is probably the mistake that kills more acting careers…trying to fit in…because that is an instinct that has been bred into most people their whole lives and it just doesn’t work in acting, except in bad acting. Don’t try to figure out what they want. Show them yourself and if you are completely unique and yourself, you just might get the part. If you do what you think is expected, the only way you are going to get the part is if there was a snow storm and no other actors could make the audition…that or the other actors were just as unimaginative and meek as you…so really sit down and take the time to know yourself, and use your full self everytime…what would you do in a given situation…not ‘what does this character sound like he would do’.

I hope that inspires a little boldness today!